Bitcoin Taps $90K, Laser Eyes Officially Back Online

Spot ETFs vacuumed up a record weekly haul and the apes feel vindicated again. Float tightening, institutions FOMO-ing, your uncle texting you about 'the blockchain.' 🦍

Bitcoin punched through $90K as spot ETFs absorbed a record weekly inflow, tightening available float and reigniting the institutional bid. The same suits who called it rat poison are now quietly stuffing it into model portfolios.

The price action has summoned the full crypto-cycle starter pack: laser-eyed avatars, 'few understand' posts, and at least one uncle asking how to buy 'the Bitcoin' at the family dinner.

Bulls say it's the start. Bears say it's the top. The chart, as always, just does whatever inflicts maximum psychological damage on the most people.